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Top Twenty Ways to Get Expelled–11/2/2010


1. Target practice. With a BB Gun.
2. Roll a keg down a hill, at the chancellor.
3. Plagiarize a paper.


4. Crack a windshield.
5. Start a fight in the parking lot, and then proceed to challenge the RAs to a fight.
6. Pull the fire alarm.
7. Take a shit in the elevator.
8. Drink beer–in the S.A.C
9. Unleash the animal.
10. Slash the tires of all the cops’ cars.
11. Pull a keg up through your dorm window.
12. Hide out in the school after hours.
13. Pretend to be a girl and get guys to send you naked photos.
14. Randomly video tape outside people’s rooms.
15. Keep a pet cat in your dorm room, after the RAs have asked you to remove it.
16. Throw eggs at the concierge desk.
17. Pants someone in the middle of the commuter hallway.
18. But a pet snake and release it into Molinaro Hall.
19. Initiate road rage in the parking lot.
20. Play Frisbee in the Ranger Hall atrium, while students are in it.

Story by Andrew Donahoe

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